my fault? tired or lost my passion?

I am tired in arranging outings for class for some time already and definitely lost passion in arranging soccer outings with the guys.

Sad thing is the guys will ask me when is the next soccer outings and why no more? Somehow, the blame is shifted to me... cos i will be the one who usually organise the soccer thingy. Did it occured to them, at times, its tiring and disappointing to receive poor response and much worst, when on the day itself, some of them will msg at the very last minute to say they are unable to make it... or worst... only when we call them, they say that they cannot make it...

I am further enraged that the person who has been turning up late, like 1- 3hrs later, is continuously asking me when is the next soccer outing. This guy always turn up LATE, i mean really LATE. I already infd the guys if u all wanna play, u all organise and I will definitely come. To date, so far no initiatives... haiz... though my knee hurts, i will still play but not that influential as i will be.

For the class outing, the normal annual chalets that we have, I grown a bit tired in organising or assisting. Initially, I was always pumped up and would call my old classmates personally to ask if they can make it and asked them how they are doing. That's me I will call and asked. I still do this time... but a bit hesistant cos' it been years.. There's always 2 person that i want to come, but alas, they somehow cannot make it. Last year, one of them make it... I was happy and wished she came earlier (years ago)... She and I has some history and I always wanted it to be resolve... As usual YT and Idris brought up the issue and I just told them, I am tired and told them not to expect much especially last year we had a record attendance. I am also tired of COOKING~~~~!!!!!!!!!! It's always me at the BBQ pit!!!! I want to be able to talk, interact... haiz.... I already taught some of the guys how to start fire and these grp of guys are not their fault, at least i see them always helping me unlike some... guess there will always be such ppl... nowadays, when there is other bbq other than my class, i do not tell them i can bbq... but i will definitely help out.

Just tired? or lost my passion?